windupmusebox | Texts From Last Night

1. I currently don't understand fingers.

2. You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.

3. Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?

4. My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.

Fingers are a social construct we all need to wake up from.

I am in no condition to argue this

Only once we abandon the puritan preconceptions of society can we see our fingers as what they are: A bunch of tiny cocks

So you're pretty stoned right now right?

Ten whole dicks.

Painkillers are a always a ride.

because im the newly elected king of the arts and crafts club lmao

theres one in your freezer too but that one is taped ♥

I want to say that that doesn't completely answer the question, but it does begin to explain it.

What am I supposed to do with a frozen dildo?

lots of questions never get answers. just jump to whatever conclusion you want. who will be able to confirm otherwise?

idk have you ever wanted to have sex with a ice monster? a vampire? the yeti? it could make some dreams come tru

Some questions don't need answered anyways I guess.

I would not expect a vampire to be quite that cold.

mystery is always good. keeps you interested in me lol

so your fantasy creature of choice is a vampire..... hmmmmmmmm... noted!

Compared to yetis certainly.

if you find a vampire, make sure to tell me, however.

they might be nice to cuddle with after sex. give the yetis a chance!!

oh? owo why? want to jump on that before i do? its okay, my love, ill be fair!